Ladies' Retreat 2016: Anchored

Every year my church dedicates a weekend in September to our annual Ladies' Retreat.  I have gone twice and had to skip once when my daughter was due to make her arrival.  This fall, I had already committed to going to Cry Out, so I was considering passing up this opportunity.  But my husband looked at me and said, "You should go. Seriously."  But, money. But, time.  But...

Sometimes you just gotta kick your own "buts" out, ya know?

And in the first mixer activity (aaahhh) when I stammered out "I ate a brownie...?" to the question "What have you done for yourself this week?" I knew two retreats in the same month was JUST what the doctor ordered God ordained.  Hallelujah.

This year celebrates 20 consecutive Ladies' Retreats.  So we couldn't NOT go big.  We stayed at the most quiet, beautiful marina right on the coast of Lake Michigan surrounded by cute shops, yummy restaurants and everything a girl's weekend needs. The rain even halted for a little bit and the breeze and sun and quiet splashing of the water on all the docked boats was serenity itself.  *Deep sigh*

We arrived Friday evening, checked in, and had our first session complete with snacks, games, songs and...more games.  I always appreciate getting to know women I have never talked one-on-one with before.  Retreat bonds women.

Saturday morning we enjoyed a light breakfast and gathered back together for our second session.  This time we heard a moving testimony from one woman and then had a second woman share thoughts from Proverbs 2 about being anchored to God in our decision making.  Having women boldly share from their own lives, not to strangers, but to women they see every week... is powerful.  Encouraging.  Next, we enjoyed nearly 6 hours of glorious free time:  we ate at the Stray Dog (um, delicious) walked around to lovely local home decor shops and then I soaked up every minute of time on our balcony overlooking the docks.  We later took a walk down towards the coast, climbed up the dune walk (a boardwalk like path all along the coast with an incredible view), and even got to bike around the town on the hotel's free bikes!

Around 6 we came back together for an Italian buffet catered in by the hotel.  SO. YUMMY. And an hour later we settled in for our second Saturday session.  A young lady from my table stood up and shared what God had been teaching her this summer, and then a youth leader from our church shared with us how we can be anchored in our identity in Christ.  There probably was not a dry eye in the room as she shared the struggles and pains of her own childhood and journey.  She even shared some of the biggest blessings in her life.  And her summary lumped the junk and the joy in the same category:  it doesn't define her.  Christ Jesus defines her. Nothing else.  Even if many ladies couldn't relate to the hard times she had gone through, we were ALL touched by those truths.

Perhaps the most moving time of all came Sunday morning as we gathered for our last group session.  We pushed all the tables out of the way and then gathered the chairs in one huge circle.  We had two ladies from our Body share their testimonies:  one of losing her husband and how God has brought her through the toughest time in her life, and the other of how God led her to forgive her abusive and neglecting parents and her unfaithful ex-husband.  They beautifully set the stage for bold, transparent, real talk.  Then, we were each handed a note card and asked to write our deepest fear on it.  After some time, many ladies stood up, shared their fear with the group and then symbolically walked to the center of the room and tossed, crumbled, shredded, stomped on their note card as they turned it over to God.  The things shared in that room were deep.  Personal.  Raw.  But more than any of those things, they were obedient.  The women in that room listened attentively to the Holy Spirit and shared what He was asking them to share.  And it united our group.  Isn't that what Christ has always wanted for His Church?

As we dismissed, women who had shared (and cried, let's be real) were surrounded by other women who thanked them, embraced them, (cried with them, let's be real) and bathed them in prayer.  We felt connected.  We empathized.  And then we each got our belongings, went to our cars and headed back to our normal lives.

But, by the grace of God alone, our lives will never be the normal we knew before this retreat.  Because, thanks to the time and effort of our wonderful committee and thanks to the faithfulness of our Heavenly Father, we have been changed.  We have been taught.  We have been broken.  And we have been re-anchored to our True Hope.

What is your anchor?

Children in Church

Over the past few months, I have personally read and thought a lot about this topic:  Why do some churches expect children to be part of the worship service and other churches have a wide variety of other places children should be during that time?

A little bit of background might be helpful.  I grew up in a Lutheran church where we sat through the service alongside our parents.  My earliest memories are of asking my dad "how much longer do we have?" in a hushed tone as he pulled out the worship bulletin and pointed to where we were in the order of service.  I remember being proud of myself for keeping my eyes closed for the entire prayer time.  Let's be honest, it was pretty long for child's attention span.  But we did it. We moved churches after my 5th grade year, and ended up at a small Baptist church.  It was pretty much opposite in every way.  There was a nursery for young children and then a "children's church" time for older kids.  They would stay for songs, greeting time and announcements and then go to their own, age appropriate sermon message.

Fast forward to today, and I am a member of a Grace Brethren Church that is in between the Lutheran and Baptist church in size.  I never paid much attention to what the children did during the worship service, until my daughter was born.  Now, almost 2, she is dropped off in the nursery from the moment we walk in the building until the completion of the service.  There are classes for students up through 5th grade, in fact.  Very rarely are children brought into special services, sermons, songs, or any time with the rest of the congregation.   And, truthfully, it rubbed me wrong as soon as I had to drop my young baby off in the nursery.  I wanted her with me.  That feeling was magnified when I went back to work.  I thought, I send my daughter to a babysitter five days out of the week, and now I have to send her off again on Sunday?!  Whether it was intentional or not, I felt an unspoken expectation that I maintain the quiet, professional atmosphere in the sanctuary by sending my infant into the nursery.  Everyone was doing it.  Literally, everyone.

So, as I have spent the better part of 2 years thinking through what I believe and prefer in regards to children in the church service, I wanted to share some of the articles I have found to be particularly helpful and challenging.  Many reinforce what I have subconsciously thought for a while:  First, children should have the ability to sit quietly through a church service.  Secondly, it is good for children to see adults worshiping God.  And lastly, children can learn so many things from a worship service.

I welcome any other resources you have found as you are considering how to children can or should be involved in the service.  I, of course, understand that there are conflicting opinions and preferences on this topic and that ultimately, each family has to decide what is best in their case.

1. This quick article, "5 Reasons Children Should be Part of the Main Service Regularly" first sparked my serious consideration about the possible negative affects of removing children from corporate worship.

2. Desiring God posted this article, "Should Children Sit Through 'Big Church'?" that referenced this paper, "The Family:  Together in God's Presence."  They are both my two main pieces of reflection and interest at this point.  I really appreciate the emphasis on parenting, and at the same time it is very sobering for me.

3. This article includes both sides of this debate.  Here is the "Pro Family Worship" side, and here you can find "Real Kids Worship" points as well.  It's worth noting that ChildrensMinistry.com found that 48% of the people polled agreed with family worship time and 52% preferred age-specific worship.  Clearly, it's a pretty even split.

Old Window, New Statement

Hello, Blog Readers!  I'm back after quite the break.  Why was I gone in the first place, you ask?  Read the many reasons I stayed off social media for a month here.  Now, I'm slowly getting back into my "routine" of checking in while fighting the urge to check out too much.  I'd love to hear how all of you manage that within your families.

But, today I wanted to share a new hobby of mine!  I have always loved crafting and creating, but my funds (and storage) are super limited.  When my mom came across an old church that was getting new windows (and tossing their old ones in the trash) we decided there had to be something we could do to re-purpose them.

And they turned out looking like this:

1. First window for my sister's bridal shower gift:

2. Second window for a friend's wedding gift:

3.  Third window for my sister's house warming gift:

4. Fourth window for a friend's house warming gift:

(Picture coming soon!)

As long as our window supply lasts (I think we have like 10-15 more sitting in the shed!) I will keep trying to come up with different people to give them to/sell them to (more on that later!) and different ways to use them.  They really are very easy to do...so if you ever want to try, here is the process I used:

Materials:

Chalk Paint (I recommend Dutch Boy brand, found at Menards)
Paint Marker
Wax Finish
Windex/Water
Sanding/Stripping Supplies
Cheap, Coarse Paintbrush
Heavy Picture Hanging Kit (I recommend Ook brand, up to 30 lbs)
Old Window
Tarp or Garbage Bags
Painter's Tape or Razor Blades
Cheesecloth

Procedure:

1. Clean glass on both sides before you start. Old windows can be quite...filthy.

 2. Lightly sand edges of window to remove any loose chunks of old paint and large splinters.  On the first window, I tried to remove the old fixtures of the window, but since then I found it easier to just paint over them and go with it!

3. Lay window on tarp/garbage bag to paint.  Heavily coat one side of window with paint.  Be sure to get all the small cracks, metal fixtures, and even the beveled edge that attaches to the glass. If you choose to use painter's tape, make sure it is laid on the glass and pressed right up against the wood.  I have found that it's easier to messily paint first and use a razor blade to tidy up the glass afterwards.

Sometimes you just gotta catch up on The Voice re-runs as you craft.

4. After that side is dry (usually close to 1 hour of wait time), flip the window and repeat step 3.  It is worth noting that from the opposite side you should again pay careful attention to the deep cracks in the sides of the window.  Even when I thought I painted everything, I would notice bare spots once I flipped the window over.

5. Even though most chalk paints claim a one coat coverage, I always do two.

6. Using a flat razor blade, carefully scrape off all the excess paint that landed on the glass, if you did not use painter's tape.  This also comes in handy when you make multiple mistakes on step 9!

7. Using your sanding materials, distress the places on the window that would naturally wear away:  corners, around fixtures, and edges. I have noticed this sometimes alters the color of the paint you have used to a lighter shade.

8. I recommend using Windex/water to re-clean both sides of the window at this point.  It's probably quite dusty again!

9. Using a paint marker, write the word/drawing that you desire to be the focus of the window.  I always sketch my idea first with a pencil on a piece of paper and then look at that to help me draw it on the window.  You could also trace something easily through the glass, if that's easier for you. When I know what I want to write but don't know how to format it, I often look online for different fonts or styles to use.  These pictures show how I go in stages to get the look I want:  Write it quickly for spacing/size, then scrape off any mistakes and slowly bold the letters I want to emphasize.

10. Place a quarter sized piece of wax between the folds of the cheesecloth and rub it everywhere you have used the chalk paint.  You will notice it shows up darker initially but dries quickly. Using a cheesecloth is the only way I have found of making the wax disperse evenly, otherwise it will streak...but sometimes that adds to the vintage distressed look.  Wax will help the chalky finish not to get on people's hands or walls as they handle the window.

11.  Follow the directions for how to install the hanging kit.  The one I use comes with two D-hooks (one on each side of the window).  If you install them lower, you won't see the wire above the window, but the window may hang away from the wall a little more and the wire will show through the glass.  If you install the hooks higher on the window it will hang flesh with the wall but the wire will be visible.

12.  To "gift wrap" this I suggest getting a large gift bow to stick on the corner, or buying large gift tags that you can tie with twine or ribbon diagonally across the top.  I also save the hanging kit original packaging with the wire and instructions and hang it from the back of the window so the recipient can know how to finish the hanging process.

These normally take me one whole afternoon/evening because of painting, waiting an hour, flipping, drying, etc.  Sometimes the following day I go back over the paint marker spots again to make them thicker.

What do you think?  Have you re-purposed old windows before?  Please share any tips or thoughts you have on the process!

Also, if you would like to buy one of these windows from me, I'd love to make one for your home.  If you can pick them up in Warsaw or Huntington, I'd be happy to work with you to come up with a design and color scheme you like.  Depending on what color paint/how much writing you select, the price would vary.  Comment below if you are interested!

Happy Birthday to Me

Two years ago, I took a few months off of Facebook to prepare for the arrival of our first daughter.

This past winter, I stopped my endless streaming of episodes for 6 weeks to make better use of my time during the day.

And, starting tomorrow morning, I will be spending 30 days unplugged.  No more logging in to Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.  No more mindlessly scrolling through my phone while not entirely engaging with the conversation around me.  No more "multi-tasking" while my daughter finishes lunch or guilting myself into writing a blogpost that is well past due.  From May 4-June 4 I will be offline. I'm deleting apps from my phone and putting my phone in a separate room when I'm at home.  The only exception due to necessity (unfortunately) is my email.  I am going to check it once or twice a day from my laptop.  Other than that, toodles!

Why now?  The weather is getting nicer.  Then worse again. But mainly nicer. I'm starting to become more disciplined in my strength training and cardio.  My daughter is so fun to play with and I hate not giving her the attention she deserves.  We have many upcoming travel plans both within the state and outside of the country.  God has given me a greater hunger for Scripture than ever before in my life.  I even think I want to try to memorize a whole book of the Bible!  I'll let you know how that works out. We have major life decisions coming up as a family.  I want to implement some form of fasting (maybe a version of this plan?) periodically.  I have an ever growing list of prayer requests and seemingly fewer minutes in my day to pray over them.  It's my birthday month.  So, really, why NOT now?  When I write all those goals out, I can't help but feel like 30 days won't even be enough!

As I struggle with how to make these big changes and huge decisions, Romans 12:2 really convicted my heart:

"...let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.  Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect."

So, I'm going to give God a little more peace and quiet to work in my heart and mind.  To transform me into a new person who can learn His perfect will for my life by changing the way I think.  I'm not saying a break from the internet is the answer to everything, but for me it is necessary from time to time.  And as Romans 14:22-23 reminds us, "Blessed are those who don't feel guilty for doing something they have decided is right. But if you have doubts about whether or not you should eat something, you are sinning if you go ahead and do it.  For you are not following your convictions.  If you do anything you believe is not right, you are sinning."

If you like seeing pictures of my daughter, or you enjoy articles that I read or crafts that I have tried, I look forward to seeing you back here in June!

Toodles :)

Easter Bunny Lessons

As I researched more for Easter and how to teach a toddler some of the significance behind this holiday, I came across this post thanks to Focus on the Family.  I especially loved the suggestions for incorporating how the world views Easter (fuzzy, adorable, Easter bunnies!) and using them as an object lesson for how Christ wants to help us act.  So, I came up with some visuals because I like to waste a nap-time and not do dishes...  Feel free to download these, print them off and use them to remind yourself and your children of how to act like "Easter bunnies."

You could attach these to a bag of chocolate bunnies, marshmallow bunnies or place them next to a REAL bunny (!!).  You could also have older children look up and read the Bible verses mentioned or have younger kids look for books and stuffed animals that have bunnies in them to further the illustration.

In looking for cute ways of incorporating God's wisdom into the world's foolishness, I came across THIS BLOG which has dozens of adorable printables.  I'm in love.  I especially liked her cute suggestions for how to redo an entire Easter basket with Scripture references.

I had a little too much fun playing on Canva, as always.  Have you tried to make visuals on here?!

The carrot.

Hope you enjoyed this creative concept from Focus on the Family as much as I did.  Make sure to check out their ideas for more object lessons!

Staying Focused on Easter in a World of Bunnies.

First of all, I blogged every day last week two weeks ago on my teacher blog.  That's unheard of from this blogger-wannabe.  I'd like to say that's the explanation for why I haven't blogged on here all week for a while, but I have not yet fully committed to a set schedule in blogging, so that can also be blamed.  Thanks for hanging around, even when I'm inconsistent, y'all :)

As we get closer and closer to Easter this year, I'm increasingly convicted by how much I just let it creep up on me.  I anticipate Christmas and plan out a whole week of celebrations for birthdays at times, but when it comes to the celebration of my Savior rising from the dead, I just do my normal thing and try to be more grateful?!  How utterly lazy and ridiculous. 

For the past couple of weeks, I have been trying to intentionally plan out ways of reflecting and celebrating Christ's life, death and resurrection.  Last week I really began to (try to) put the plans into action!  My list includes some things for me personally, some activities I want to try to do with Naya, and some things that we will do as a whole family.  Here is what I am shooting for:

1. John Piper's 50 Reasons Why Jesus Came to Die:  My goal is to read 3-4 of these short chapters each night before bed to help me slowly process the multifaceted purpose of Christ dying.  My husband read this aloud to me two years ago, but this year I am hoping to really spend more time in it.  Piper's readings can be pretty deep for some people, but I have really enjoyed reading more of his articles and this particular book includes a lot of direct Scripture quotations (which I really appreciate).

2. Easter Breakfast/Sunday Service: Our home church has a free breakfast before the church service on Easter.  The food is great, the conversations are genuine and enthusiastic and I love seeing Naya interact with our church family.

3. Hidden In My Heart: Volume III A Lullaby Journey Through the Life of Jesus:  This set of CD's was first brought to my attention on Revive Our Hearts when I was listening to a podcast.  With Naya's obsession with music, and our playlists getting annoyingly short and repetitive, I thought this would be a great "Easter gift" for her.  I know I will enjoy listening to it, too!  My favorite part is that this volume is explicitly the words of our Savior set to music.  How lovely.

4. The Gospel of John: My husband reminded me, when I was trying to select a passage to read, that the Gospel of John has the most amount of chapters dedicated to the time between the Last Supper and the Ascension.  That, in addition to the fact that we are in a long series on Mark in church and I am very familiar with Matthew, led me to believe John might guide my mind and heart well in this time. Side note: I'm reading it aloud, and in Spanish.  It's SO CHALLENGING for me this way, and I think it really makes me stop and focus on each word and phrase.  I feel like I'm reading John for the first or second time.

" 'If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink.  Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him.' By this he meant the Spirit, whom those who believed in him were later to receive." -John 7:38-39

  5. Focus on the Family's Free Resources for Holy Week: This was a direct answer to prayer! I received this email on the exact day that I was asking God how I could start teaching Naya about the meaning behind Easter.  I am hoping this year we will start by making the palm branches, baking bread, foot washing.  I know that the conversations will be pretty much by myself at this point, but I also want to get into the habits (for me AND her) of being intentional. Celebrating things worth celebrating.  Learning by doing.  Experiencing.

6. Extended Family Luncheon: After church we will drive to my parent's house where my mom's family will celebrate by eating together.  I always enjoy being around my cousins, aunts and uncles and other family members.  Now that there are 3 great-grandchildren in the bunch, it is really fun to see them all around each other.

7. "O the Blood" by Kari Jobe: Last Sunday, Marc Eckel did his Splat Experience display during our church service and used this song as his background music.  The words combined with the incredible image brought tears almost instantly.  I have listened to it many times since, and will continue to listen to it throughout the week.

" O what love, no greater love.  Grace, how can it be that in my sin, yes even then He shed His blood for me?!"

*****************

When Naya is a bit older, I hope to spend more time diving into resources such as these: 

1. Resurrection Eggs DIY

2. Age Specific Activities from Focus on the Family

3. Dr. James Dobson's Pinterest Board!

And if you are reading this post thinking "What IS the Spiritual Truth behind Easter?  Why don't we just go on Easter egg hunts and eat chocolate bunnies like everyone else and call it good enough?  What is so special about Easter?"...oh, dear friend, let me show you.  Read this for a good starting point. Then, comment here or reach out to me with questions.  Because the reason behind Easter is the reason for life.  It's everything.

:::17 revelations about my 17 month old:::

Our daughter is 17 months old and I can hardly believe it.  She is going through so many learning growth spurts lately, and I wanted to record all my thoughts and memories in one place:

Here are 17 thoughts, struggles, developments and obsessions of my 17 month old daughter:

1. Diaper changes are changing:  She hates them.  She throws a fit, arches her back and does everything in her power to roll over in the most inconvenient times.  She must have an item in her hands at all times, although she will normally just throw it over the edge of the desk that serves as her changing table.  We have started changing her standing up every once in a while and although it is very tricky for me, she seems to do better.

2. Everything that is not a toy, is a toy:  She can reach everything. She can open everything.  She only just started walking and running often and well.  So, she has hit the inevitable stage of playing with envelopes, tupperware, headbands and dirty laundry rather than toys.  Yesterday the little sneak got a tortilla off my plate OFF THE TABLE. I think she is getting taller and more devious by the day!

3. One nap is rough. We dropped her morning nap just after Christmas, and I think I can say just in the past couple of weeks have we got it "down."  This includes:  getting up a little later (8ish),doing activities in the morning, eating lunch earlier (11ish) and trying to get one dirty diaper changed BEFORE laying her down.  Her one nap really has to be 3 hours if it's going to be a pleasant evening.  So, if said dirty diaper happens to interrupt that, she gets books and stuffed animals in her crib until 3 hours is up.

When mom takes too long on that next bite of lunch...

4. My inconsistency in language teaching hasn't slowed her understanding.  This baby responds to Spanish and English better by the day.  She definitely doesn't hear Spanish as often as I intended.  But even when I "get back on the horse" she knows a few body parts, all her signs, and a few commands in Spanish which is AMAZING to me considering the days that I forget to intentionally practice at all.  Thank you, God, for grace here.

5. Sand is icky.  On our most recent trip to Florida, the ideal day at the beach was cut very short by the whining that ensued the second any body part touched the sand.  She seemed to freeze on the spot and lose her ability to walk/crawl/communicate.  She would FREAK.

6. Snow is fun!  We've really only had one major snowstorm this entire winter and it came this past week.  I bundled her up, but in her curiosity she took off her gloves, touched the snow, smiled, crawled, tried to catch snow flakes.  She enjoyed it for a full...six minutes I'd say.  But still

7.  The baby that stares back at her when she walks by any mirror is really fun to talk to.  I can't stop laughing when I see this.  She waves, she talks, she even tries to give headbands or books to this new friend...and gets very frustrated when that baby can't take them from her. Also, she puts both hands on her newly growing hair and acts like she's fixing it.

8.  Really, the stainless steel trashcan in the kitchen, is pretty much just another mirror.  She KISSES the friend in this "mirror." (GAGGGG)

9. "What did you find?" is a much better way to get said item out of her hands than "NO!"  She will happily bring whatever she has to me and set it on my lap if I ask it in this way.  It's all in the intonation.  Trying to encourage her rather than scold her seriously changes her attitude, even if it's a dangerous object (yikes, crochet hooks) or a highly desired item (hi, mom's phone).

10. She is a bottomless pit. She is getting dangerously close to eating a normal "kids" portion of food.  She wants snacks constantly.  Anything that is on my plate is something she wants to try, even after she has asked to get down.  Then, of course, there are days when she nearly starves herself.  But those are fewer and further between.

11. She learns new words every week.  Most recently, she has used "up!" correctly and something that sounds like "butt" means belly button.  She also regularly says "anks!"for thanks while signing it simultaneously...as a matter of fact, she has started to do that with all her signs at this point, which I love..."ma" (mas), "po" (por favor) and "agua" are the only distinct Spanish sounds she makes when she signs; the rest she tends towards the English word.  BUT STILL!

12. Music cures everything.  Ever since we started attending a weekly music class, this girl is obsessed. She knows the ipod plays music so she points to it at every nap/bed-time while pumping her hands in the air so we get the picture.  She has instruments that she gets out while we listen to CD's.  And she LOVES watching people sing/dance/play instruments at church or in videos.

13. I may have accidentally made her a lefty.  In my selfishness to avoid a mess, I haven't really been giving her many opportunities to feed herself.  I know, I'm slacking here.  So, we've been doing more and more the past couple weeks and I've been accidentally putting the spoon in her left hand, thinking it's her right.  So now she heavily favors her left when eating. Oopsie.

14."Can you put that back?" makes cleaning up sound fun!  She has a really good memory for what toys go where and where she found something.  She even starts to say "bah" for back when I say it, and really does try for the most part to put things away.

15. The word "gentle" gives her an idea of how NOT to hit.  She has been a hitter for a while.  And I (cluelessly) started smacking her hands.  When that didn't work, I squeezed them and said "NO!" loudly.  We tried crib timeouts.  Then someone suggested "gentle hands" and showing her what that means, and that has worked much better.  So now I say, "Are you being gentle?" and she awkwardly pets my face.  It's great.

16. Yoga is interesting.  And mom is a jungle gym, duh.  Self explanatory?

Mom in crow pose.  Baby about to pounce.

Watching #doyouyoga 's 30 day challenge & trying some moves...

17. DADA IS THE BEST PART OF THE DAY.   When that man walks in the door, her world stops.  She nearly screams "DADA!!" and runs to him.  Probably 10+ times throughout the day when she sees a picture of him, she points and says his name.  Momma might as well be chopped liver.  But I love it :)

What is YOUR 17 month old up to, or what you do you remember about when your child was this age?